Birthday <3

As I stated in my previous post, we were not dismissed right away after our end of class routine. Master Eric stayed talking to us while Sensei disappeared into the office. I was a little suspicious that what he was doing might have something to do with my birthday, but then again everyone had already acknowledged it, and I'd gotten just what I wanted: to spend my birthday somewhere that I felt safe and loved.

Well it turned out my sneaking suspicion was right. Sensei came back carrying a huge cake, with two candles on top denoting my age. The candles were blown out and "Happy Birthday" was sung, much to my happy embarrassment. Master Eric had also been in on the plan, because as soon as the cake business was done he dismissed us. The cake was cut, and as is tradition, I got the first piece.

Most of my classmates stayed for cake and Master Eric, Master Markus, and Miss Linda had some too. Pictures were taken, and we chatted for awhile. Just when I thought there couldn't be any more surprises, Danny reached into his belongings and pulled out some Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Apparently, while Sensei had been in charge of procuring my cake, Danny had been put on present detail. Not only that, but Danny informed me that the owners of the game shop where I play Dungeons and Dragons had contributed toward the cost of the cards so the present was from them as well.

Shortly after that I said my thank yous and took the leftover cake home. All in all a very pleasant birthday.

Misha

Formal Training Week Seven Part Two

On Wednesday Aug 31, 2011 I again went to Equa Do. It was my birthday, and since nobody I live with would have been home and I knew there was nothing they had planned for me, I chose to spend it with Sensei, the other instructors and my classmates. I had gotten permission to do so from Master Eric at Gurnee Days

Despite it being a very special day, I opted to participate in class, as my birthday is generally not an occasion that has gone smoothly or pleasantly in the past. Just a side note: Wednesday was no exception. By the time I got to Equa Do I had already fought with both my parents, and had my mother wish me a happy birthday only because my dad insisted she do so. In addition, I received very grave news from my sister's doctors about her prognosis as she battles cancer. They were none too pleased after I processed all of what they were saying, and still told them I was still going to Equa Do. But, so be it. I needed to be around my surrogate family.

Anthony was not there to lead class, and so that meant it was really up to Sensei to do so. The two Combat Hapkido classes are intended to be kept mostly in sync with each other so most of what was covered I had already done the day before. However, there is that saying that practice makes perfect, and as I went through the drills, we actually discovered that I was making several errors.

Part of this has to do with who was teaching me. Much as I care about Brandon, his Aspbergers puts certain limitations on him. One of the main things that disorder affects is processing information, so it is very possible that he didn't clearly understand the technique before he began attempting to teach me. Sensei agrees that this is probably the case. And before anyone reading this goes off on me for being disrespectful toward a higher belt...I mean no disrespect. He just may not be capable of teaching this particular skill coherently yet.

So in any case, most of the night was spent polishing those techniques along with others, learned earlier in my training. This is because I am so close to testing for white belt. All too soon we were told to line up and given our end of class announcements, but dismissal was held...

Misha

Formal Training Week Seven

I arrived at the dojang quite early, but at least I wasn't the only one there. Anthony was there, and Master Eric too. We talked about school for a few minutes while I watched Anthony warm up. I also confirmed with him that I have been doing the home regimen he and the others recommended to me. I let him know just how significantly my life has changed since I began training in Combat Hapkido. He was pleased to hear that I have been especially cognizant of my behavior towards others, as the concept of self discipline is essential to the martial arts. I then received a phone call, which I had to resolve before class began, so I barely noticed Sensei's arrival.

As soon as I was off the phone, I made sure to bow in. We once again did not do striking practice, but instead spent our warmup time doing light cardio (I did half-jumping jacks) and lots of stretching. I used a lot of the stretches I used to have to do to warm up for basketball and was able to make my stretching last almost as long as those who needed to stretch their legs. Then Anthony explained what everyone would be doing for the day.

While the others were practicing forward rolls, Anthony went and got a styrofoam ring out of the equipment area. He had me put my hands through the center of the ring so the ring was resting on my wrists. Then he had me rotate my wrists in a circular motion as though rolling a ball between my palms. This circular motion is essential for many Hapkido techniques.  Also, performing certain techniques with the ring on my wrists restricts my movement, and will help reinforce the idea that I should only be working in a small, central area, with arms close to my body. Master Eric had me also incorporate some shoulder rotation, which when combined with the circular motion and my opponent's momentum, will allow me to throw my opponent if necessary. The last thing I was asked to do with the ring was to incorporate a strike with the upper hand during each rotation.

Then we moved on to a technique similar to the arm bar but more abrupt. Once a punch is thrown and you catch the wrist, the hand not holding the wrist delivers a sharp strike to the elbow. Done with enough force this will either shock or break the joint. I was working with Brandon on these techniques and doing quite well. The next technique Anthony had us work on was an extension of the first. Once the wrist is grabbed and the elbow struck, some opponents may instinctively try to pull away. If this happens, an able bodied person would be taught to step into the opponent's body and strike at the head after locking the elbow and arm against their shoulder. In my case I would bring the arm holding my opponent over their arm, pulling them into my body and immobilizing them from the inside of the elbow before striking.

After that was done, Sensei switched places with Brandon and we worked for awhile on striking a moving limb. Once the incoming strike from an opponent is brushed away from the body, it is in many situations prudent to strike at the limb, either to shock or disable it. This can give you a chance to move onto other vulnerable areas if necessary.

The very last thing I did before the end of class was something I asked Anthony to address with me. I take a paratransit company to get around because I cannot drive. By law, they must put a shoulder strap on me to hold me in my chair, as a supplement to the seatbelt that's built into my chair and only goes across my lap. I usually can unbuckle this shoulder strap on my own as soon as the bus comes to a stop. However, many of the drivers don't pay attention and assume that I have not done this, and try to unbuckle the only seatbelt they see, which is the one across my lap. Having them touching my legs, especially so close to my private area, makes me very anxious, especially when they won't stop right away even when I tell them to. While it has never escalated into a sexually charged situation, I wanted to know what I could do if it ever did, whether it was one of my bus drivers or someone else.

Anthony said basically that should an opponent try to unbuckle my seatbelt and or touch me inappropriately I need to begin lashing out, kicking, striking, screaming, etc. He mimicked the behavior to see what I would do and I began striking everywhere I could reach, forcing him to stop attacking and protect his head especially. Eventually I was able to shove him backwards so he hit the ground, and then use my chair to run him over and pin him, preventing him from standing and attacking again. Sensei missed it, and so we repeated the sequence one more time at his request, only to have him fall over laughing. Moments later, we went through our end of class routine and the class was dismissed.

Misha

Formal Training Week Six Part 2

That's right, ladies and gentlemen. I spent an additional day at the dojang this week. In part, it was to go with Chad to his first private lesson, but the other reason was just that I needed to be somewhere I felt safe for awhile. Sensei was not able to make it tonight, so Chad and I worked with Master Eric instead.

Not all of the techniques we practiced tonight were purely physical. Master Eric used to be a police officer, and is teaching us techniques such as verbal deescalation, where one would assert that they either do not have what the attacker wants, or assert that one does not want things to get physical and turn over what has been demanded. Objects are replaceable. People not so much. He also said he wants us to start paying greater attention to detail, particularly when it comes to people around us. He encouraged us to look for distinguishing characteristics, (scars, tattoos, above or below average build, height, etc) that set people apart. He had us try to describe Miss Linda without looking, and even though she was teaching almost directly next to us, and I had spent some time talking with her before our lesson started, we found there wasn't much we could recall that wasn't fairly generic. Master Eric was much more accurate. This skill is important because if your attacker runs off, the details you are able to give may make all the difference in if the suspect is caught.

Then we moved on to physical work. This section of the lesson focused on recognizing which hand an attacker is grabbing us with from behind, and responding appropriately by grabbing it and pulling them down across our body and into an arm bar, if not throwing. The same was executed when the back of the neck was grabbed, and the hair or head. If the hair is grabbed, don't pull up, push down and slide the attacker's hand off, and into a hold. Most importantly, if you are grabbed, cover the attacker's hand with your own as quickly as possible to gain an advantage.

We worked lastly, on using our chairs as weapons. When I grabbed Master Eric tonight, I used the momentum of my grab to slam my chair back into him and throw him off balance, also wedging his foot against the tippy bars. You can also pop a wheelie and bring either tippy bars or footplate down on the foot. Wedging a knee between frame and wheels is also effective.

I really enjoyed the opportunity to gain an extra lesson this week. I know if I keep working hard, I can achieve my goal of becoming an instructor.

Misha

Test Anxiety

Last night I shared with all of you that I had received permission to test for white belt and my dobok when I felt ready. I was confident when answering Anthony's questions yesterday, but when I woke up this morning, my excitement had waned a bit and I realized I was unsure.

Part of it is that no one can make me 100 percent aware of how the test works. What I mean is, Sensei can't (and shouldn't) tell me what I will be tested on and in what order. Am I really ready for anything? The other problem I'm facing is that my training is so  different from that of my classmates. Most of their work is unarmed, while I am being trained to fight with a cane. But then again, they have to learn and properly execute kicks and I don't, so I guess it balances out. I'm assuming that because I train with a weapon at times, I will need to be prepared to demonstrate those skills when I test.

What it really comes down to is that I need to stop doubting myself. I need to stop selling myself short to others as well. Sensei told me last night that the time I was allowed to spend watching Spike was actually a test of sorts, to see if I was ready to attempt the test for my white belt. Part of any student's job at Equa Do is to take those who are less experienced than they are, and help them to learn. By managing to keep control of Spike I showed that I can keep abreast of a situation and correct improper behavior or technique. Also, several of the younger students kept asking me to either give them Spike's leash or allow the leash to drop altogether. I gently refused each time, telling them Master Eric had specifically asked for my assistance.  This showed Master Eric that I can follow instructions, and also that I know my duty. Had I let Spike run, he would have headed straight for the training area to see all the people, and possibly gotten hurt. This is the same reason I did not take Spike outside where he might have been able to pull me into the street. I would need to place similar limits on what inexperienced students can attempt during training, or at least enforce the ones the other instructors set.

When Sensei and I originally talked about when I would test for my white belt, he said that I would probably need to wait until the testing day after this one. However last night, he told me what had changed. Firstly he said that I was one of the faster learners in my class and I pick up new skills quickly. When corrected, I only need to be shown once or twice before the correct technique is routinely implemented. Secondly, I show up for class on time or early, dressed appropriately, and ready to work. Dojang ettiquite is always observed, from my attire, to respect for my training space, to how I address my instructors. I very rarely take breaks during class, preferring to shake off any discomfort and continue to work. Anything I am given to practice at home is always done, sometimes a little overdone. This has shown Sensei, Anthony, Master Eric and Master Markus that I am dedicated, though I manage to enjoy myself as well.

Even more importantly, I can not only learn and perform techniques well, but I am able to articulate them to others when needed. That has been evidenced both by this blog, and the work I have done with Chad, whether at the school or in private. This is the mark of someone who may one day become an instructor, and Sensei said because of our relationship, and the fact that he is my teacher, I will more than likely end up working with him.

I think right now what is making me afraid is that this is something I want so badly. I'm afraid I'll convince myself that I'm ready just to take the chance and fail. And I'm afraid of disappointing so many people that I love and care about at once. What would Master Eric, or Anthony, Miss Linda, Master Markus, or even Sensei think, if I blew it on some small mistake?

The rational side of me says that won't happen. And I know that. But my parents would have seen a failure at something like this as a reason I couldn't continue to participate in the classes. That's what they did to me with wheelchair basketball. I only played in one game and we lost so horribly that my parents said they couldn't see me getting any better and for as far as they had to drive to get to practice it wasn't worth the effort on their part. And given the expensive testing fee I'm afraid to spend the money if there is even a chance I might fail.

Its clear that I have a bit more soul searching to do. I'm going to wait another week, and as long as next week goes well I will submit the form for permission to test to Anthony. I know Anthony and Sensei, not to mention Master Eric, would not be supportive of me testing if it were not the right step to take.

Hopefully,

Misha

Formal Training Week Six

This week was my first week of training where I had a full day of college coursework beforehand. Surprisingly, I was not too fatigued to train. I got to the dojang super early again, since the bus company had to give me an earlier ride over there than I usually have. I know I have beaten Master Eric there before, but this time, not only did I beat Master Eric, I beat Master Markus as well. The good news was that Anthony was back! I got to watch him warm up and prep for the beginning Tae Kwon Do class. Before long Master Markus and Master Eric arrived as well.

As has been the trend for the last few weeks, Master Eric brought along his chihuahua, Spike. Spike and I get along quite well and I really enjoy playing with him when I am not training. The only difference is that tonight, when Master Eric brought the last load of things into the dojang from his car, he handed me Spike's leash and asked me to watch him until it was time for class. To me, this was a huge vote of confidence in me, that I would be asked to watch something I know to be very precious to Master Eric and his family. Spike enjoyed running around Equa Do with me following as best I could, stopping to give everyone he saw puppy kisses, including Sensei and Brandon when they arrived.

Soon though, it was time for class. Anthony had me do a different warm up today while the others were working on jumping jacks. He told me to hold my hands in ready position, and picture the position of the twelve numbers on the face of a clock. He asked me to pick six of the twelve positions and strike out towards them in random sequence. This warmup was designed to help me in being ready for punches to come from any direction, not just in front of me. Then we did full body stretches, along with the usual wrist ones. I did shoulder stretches, elbow stretches, wheel reaches, and neck stretches.

While the others worked on a "point grip", Sensei worked with me on the unarmed deflection my warmup from Anthony was designed to teach. He struck at me with padded blockers on various areas of my body. My goal was to deflect all the strikes simply by brushing them away. While this was difficult at first I slowly got the hang of it. We went faster and faster, then switched over to drflrcting punches and I am now able to do so with significant speed. Then I learned the point grip as well. Basically a point grip means if someone points their finger at you in a threatening manner and you have reason to believe the encounter will escalate, you grab the hand and wrench the outstretched finger back while turning it inward.

Then we worked on takedowns. For the first one, assuming the opponent grabs you by the shirt and goes to throw a punch you brush it out of the way and transfer it to the other arm so both of the opponent's arms are locked down, then strike just above the elbow. The other starts out the same but rather than striking once you have evaded the punch you grab at the opponent's clothing and yank down and away, essentially throwing them.

By this time of the night class was almost over, so Sensei and I worked on deflection again.I began to feel pain and vertigo from a possible ear infection, Rather than just brush it off, Sensei used what he knows of traditional Chinese medicine to channel my qi, or energy, which was causing me pain, and remove it. He then performed a nerve strike so my body would relax and continued working with me.

End of class routine went as normal, except that we were reminded about belt testing on September 17th. Earlier in class, I had mentioned to Sensei and Brandon that I didn't think I would ever be able to perform well enough to earn my white belt. Sensei disagreed. Just to prove me wrong, he asked Anthony when he thought I might be ready to test. Anthony asked me whether I knew certain techniques white belts are tested on, and when I was able to demonstrate that I did, I was given permission to test as early as the 17th. This, along with showing Robbie and Master Eric what I learned, was the best part of my night.

Glad it ended on such a high note.

In celebration, I share with you a picture of me and Sensei, taken last week after training.

Proudly,

 Misha

Everyday Superhero

When most people think of the term "martial artist", they don't see what I do. They think, because of Hollywood, that either martial arts is all show and no skill, or that those trained in the martial arts are ruthless killing machines. Master Eric has his own definition, which I much prefer. In Master Eric's mind, one of the duties of a martial artist is to be an "everyday superhero". Those who study the martial arts tap into their deepest sources of strength and power. That is tempered with discipline, when we are taught control, and how to act with honor and dignity. One of the ways we can do so is to help those that are clearly in need.

This is a lesson I took particularly to heart, and I have had multiple opportunities in the past few weeks to help those who were struggling. Sensei knows about each incident, and is very proud. Though let me say for the record I was not looking for praise when I spoke to Sensei. Rather, I was anxious about performing these random acts of kindness because in the family I grew up in such actions were seen as interfering in other people's lives.

The first instance occurred a little over a week ago. I found out that a couple friends of mine had gotten their power shut off because they were taken off the payment plan which let them pay their bill on their low income. My immediate response was to insist they stay with us, so they could charge their phones and the power chair Lauren had been needing to use due to an injured knee. While they stayed with us I made sure they had everything they needed and spent little of their own limited money. They have been good friends to me and are always willing to help when I need it and it is possible for them to do so.

The second instance takes a little more explanation. I was down in the college bookstore with my friend Rob while he got his books and it was extremely crowded. Well, all of a sudden I heard what sounded like a toddler's scream of frustration. I located the sound of the noise and as I did, I saw the mother and her two children being escorted from the bookstore, and all because she needed to have her diaper bag with her in order to care for her kids. I thought this was quite ridiculous and quickly stepped outside. As soon as I did I saw the mother and her two boys, and she was struggling to get them under control, considering they were both overwhelmed and overtired.

I pushed my chair over, and immediately, the children were distracted, fascinated by my chair and my light up front wheels. I introduced myself and then allowed the boys to push me a bit. After a few minutes I pulled myself out of my chair so the boys could try it out for themselves. I took this opportunity to learn that the boys' mom was a little younger than me, and the boys were 3 and 20 months. My heart already went out to her, and then she added that she was going through a nasty divorce.

She was so grateful for my assistance in occupying the boys, but what else could I do? Rob was stuck in line in the bookstore anyway, so it wasn't like I had anywhere to be. It came down to the fact that she had a problem and I had the means to help. As a martial artist, I knew my duty and did not shirk it.

And, to be totally honest, it felt really good to help someone I knew needed it. When I told Sensei as much, later that night, he immediately reassured me that I had done the right thing, and that Master Eric would be proud.

This is a trend I know will continue as I continue to act in ways that will bring honor to myself, my teachers, and Equa Do.

Misha